We’ll try to break this down to a few nuggets of advice!
One of the most important details included with the wedding invitation is asking whether the recipients will be attending! Here are a few tips on asking for wedding guests’ RSVPs to help keep it simple and straightforward.
Rule 1: Make it easy for guests to reply
A great way to do this is to use your wedding website, most offer a RSVP service to collect responses and information. Mailing back a card is an extra step that your guests might put off or forget. These services can usually be customized to suit what you need (meal options, multiple events, etc.).
Since you’ll have other info on the site as well, guests can take a moment to check out the details when they respond. You’ll also save on the return postage!
Rule 2: Be specific about who is invited
Be specific about who is invited when you address the mailing envelopes. For example, if a guest is extended the courtesy of a plus one, that is noted on the envelope (“Mr. John Smith & Guest”). If the entire family is invited, list “The Smith Family” or specifically name each member of the family (“Mr. and Mrs. John Smith & Miss Ann Smith”), so the guests know an invitation is extended to the children.
Couples can go a step further and specifically note on the RSVP card the number of guests invited. Just include a line that states “We have reserved 2 seats in your honor.” The number can be adjusted to whatever number guests are invited and send a clear message that bringing extra guests is not a possibility. If children are not invited, you might also add note in the invitation or on the website that you are having an adults-only event.
Rule 3: The RSVP Date
One more tip for collecting your RSVPs… Set a specific RSVP deadline, so guests know a prompt response is appreciated. Allowing about a month to RSVP after guests receive their invite is customary, but it can be adjusted if needed.
When the deadline passes and there are still guests who have not replied, it’s time to contact individuals to confirm their attendance. The couple can reach out themselves or enlist a family member or wedding planner to help, but either way a polite check-in is in order. Kindly let guests know you did not receive their response and you would like to confirm if they will be attending. Don’t forget to confirm any other info collected with the RSVP like entrée selection or dietary restrictions and allergies.
Giving guests a shorter period of time to respond will hopefully encourage them to act fast and submit their response. If you give them a longer period of time to reply, they may procrastinate or forget to respond.
Destination Weddings
Timing is key to avoid issues with destination weddings. Destination are mailed earlier than non-destination weddings. We recommend about 15 weeks prior to the event. Couples should give guests plenty of notice, so they have the information to book flights and hotels, take time off work, arrange childcare, and budget to attend. However, it’s not always ideal to ask for a super early RSVP. When guests reply many months in advance, things may change in the time before the wedding. If you collect an early RSVP (or a preliminary RSVP from a save the date), be prepared for some changes as unexpected events arise. If possible, set the RSVP deadline closer to the wedding date, so when the guests submit their RSVP, the likelihood of change is lower.
